Sarah D. Shearer

I have been a mama for a whole entire year.

The only other moms I can truly speak to are those who are pregnant or newer than I am on the journey, so here are a few things I’ve learned. Actually it’s one main thing that impacts every single area of your mothering.

Society will tell you that you are empowered if you choose yourself, your dreams, career, degree, etc. But you are most empowered when you choose others and when you choose to have a healthy kingdom mindset toward your children. Your perspective is your greatest weapon.

You can choose to enjoy having a newborn baby, or you can listen to the lies that it’s all hard and you get no sleep. It’s your CHOICE. my sleep totally changed but I have never lacked what I need.

You can choose to be afraid of every possible thing happening to your baby and live paralyzed. You can refuse to let people hold them, refuse to go out of your house, and watch them constantly, ever mindful that something bad could happen….Or you could trust that God is watching your baby and no amount of control you wield will be their ultimate protection, save the grace of God.

You can choose to be paralyzed with anxiety over doing everything right, sleep training , nursing, formula, White Noise, co sleeping , Day care, working , purées, etc. Trust me you will have a million options and OPINIONS. And you have to choose what’s Right for your family, using prayer, your husband, and the Word of God. Those books don’t know your baby. Those articles on parents.com don’t know your baby. You do.

You can choose your baby over your marriage and allow your husband to grow to resent you because he always helps wrong and he was kicked out of his own bed by your choice, or you can choose your marriage, Day in and day out , knowing that that relationship is more important than ANYTHING. It’s your choice.

You can choose to be negative or you can choose to enjoy this season. It’s totally up to you.

I have chosen fear many times and it’s the wrong choice 100% of the time. I have chosen joy, fun and adventure many times, and it really is so much better. Having children is supposed to be a fun adventure, not a total downer!

There will be times things are just hard. You will cry. The baby will cry. They will get sick. You will have to make hard medical decisions. But those are moments in between an everyday rhythm that you have the power to create. What kind of mother will you be?

A joy filled, fearless, strong, capable mom who has occasionally hard days?

Or a weepy, fearful, anxious mom who can’t even enjoy her baby because she is so focused on control.

God’s will is for you to be the first kind.

Our children deserve that mama.